"Discipline is remembering what you want.” David Campbell (whoever that is. )
While I agree with this sentiment, failures of discipline are not all bad! Case in point:
After circumstances conspired to thwart my plans to load the kiln during the day on Wednesday - a surprise vet appointment, a meeting that really needed to happen, and had already been re-scheduled twice - I tried to make myself finish loading Wednesday night, in the 15 degree dark. I was gritting my teeth, growling to myself,"No! I will not let this be de-prioritized!" And then I just thought, Fuck it, I'll do it tomorrow.
All I can think is how much happier I was, loading in the brilliant sunshine and above-freezing temperatures. The wadding wasn't freezing to the furniture; my hands weren't numb and dropping wads that I had to go search for, lest they ruin work below; I didn't make dumb mistakes due to tiredness.
Of course, it also pushed the firing to Friday, unloading Monday, as I decided there was nothing to be gained by staying up all night firing. That would almost certainly have put me in bed with a migraine all day Friday. There's determination; then there's obstinance; and then there's plain old stupidity.
Failure of discipline seems to be a bit of a theme this week: I also noticed, that, despite my best intentions, I can rarely make myself do any other productive thing while the kiln is firing. It's this weird kiln of Genesisian Seventh Day, pardon the blasphemy. I had big plans to clean up my studio (and house) and to get some pots made for the next firing cycle. The most useful thing I managed was a load of laundry. I spent most of the day reading a big book: The Better Angels of Our Natures: Why Violence has Declined, and napping intermittently, like a cat. And I can't say I regret it a bit.
Unloading Monday, January 30!